♪♪ friends, family, we are gathered here today to celebrate the union between emily and murph. sure we won't haveany interruptions? don't worry. (whispers)i took care of adam. (muffled grunting) and is my distinct honor to unite emily and murph in the most holy of tradition.
(spits) i object. (crowd gasping) (adam spits) nearly all wedding traditions are nothing but pointless and expensive displays of wealth. adam, we don't have timefor this. um, actually, we do. i budgeted it into the schedule. great.
my engagement wasone thing, but i've been dreamingabout this day my whole life. my friends are here. my very traditional familyis here. you're making usproud, son. of course, we would've preferred a catholic priest, but... this is tradition, adam. the dress, the ceremony,the cake. it all symbolizes true love.
nope, those traditions represent one thing-- money. in fact, this entire ceremony has been hijacked by a greedy industrylooking to make a buck. (cash register ringing) but this is the wayweddings have always been! wrong again. american weddings were once informal affairs, held in homes or at community events like barn raisings or corn-husking bees.
i hereby pronounce you man and wife. you may now eat the corn. (whirring effect) uh, nice try, adam, but...that's not a real wedding. she's not evenwearing white. that meansshe's not a virgin. ow.no, you lout. it means i'm not rich. back then, white fabric was almost impossible to clean,
so a white dress was only meant to be worn once. poor folks can't afford that. we got to make our dresses last. brown don't show the dirt. it wasn't till i,queen victoria, wore a white dress to my wedding that other brides began to copy me to show off their wealth. but even then, it was strictly for the well-to-do. thinks she's so good in her more-than-one dress.
(coughing) and her more-than-one lung. even white wedding cakeswere all about braggin'. white sugar back thenwas so expensive, it was basicallyedible bling. oh, my cake is as white as all my friends. well, emily's wearinga white dress and we're not rich. nope, but you're making it rain like you are.
and all becauseof bridal magazines. meet vicki howard, she's theauthor of "brides incorporated" and an expert in weddingcommercialization. weddings used to besimple affairs. but then bridal magazines encouraged brides to marry like the wealthy and created a wedding industry of unrelated products like silverware, gifts for the home, and even early wedding gowns.
and they did all this when americans were at their poorest. it was the birthof an entire industry. and now the cost of weddings keeps skyrocketing. give me that. listen... people want the finest on their big day. and that comes at a price. it's not likewe're cheating people. oh, no, it's exactlywhat you're doing.
the wedding industry systematically overcharges young couples just because they can. one study found that a majority of flower shops, photographers,ooh, and cake shops... no way, jose! ...charged more for a wedding than they did for a birthday party of the same size. it's called the wedding tags. basically, anything ashley here booked for you
is a rip-off. um, i have to go,uh, count mason jars or something like that. mm-hmm. that's insane. how can they get awaywith this? well, this culture's spending is now so pervasive, if you don't do it, your family will be pissed. murph, where arethe floral centerpieces?
you can't have a weddingwith floral centerpieces. mom, they were two grand extra. you're breakingyour mother's heart. tell ashley to put it on the discover. (cash register rings) well, maybe going throughthis whole expensive ordeal together will make usstronger as a couple. ooh, sorry, babe. researchers at emory university
found that the more you spend on your wedding, you're actually more likely to end in divorce. how do you know that? this... was my bachelorette party. oh, yeah, that was fun. but he has a point. i mean, no one we paid to help plan this wedding gives two craps if we stay together or not.
that is not true. i care very deeply about... emily and smurf. the discover card was declined. should i use the amex? remain calm, murph. it's your special day. it's yourspecial day! don't go nuts at your ownwedding, even though... is he okay? oh, yeah.
that's just his thinking walk. no, not today, conover! because, guess what,buddy? i just figured out your little lesson. oh, well, tell me.i love to learn. (clears throat) a century of advertising has distracted us from what's really important. it's not about the money or the gifts
or the thread count of the table runners. it's about love. all this, it's just about you and me declaring our eternal, undying love for each other. that's what weddings used to be about. and that's what i want our wedding to be about, too. because i love you, emily, and i always will. (crowd)aww... ah, babe.i love you, too.
so, adam, you want to take back that objection? oh... gosh,i wish i could, but science says your feelings are almost certain to change. want me to tell youabout it? oh, please do! please do! all right, people, this is gonna be a while. so let's just start the dinner course and we will finish the ceremony later, okay? thanks. ahh!
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